Dating can be fun! You get to meet new people and see if they’re a match for you. But we all know that the road to love is filled with bumps and potholes—and many of them occur on the first date! Check out these nine first date mistakes. Have you made any of them?
1. Standing Them Up (Getting Stood Up)
Have you ever had a date with someone, only to have them not show up? Or have you made plans with someone and then changed your mind at the last minute? Unless you can’t get to your phone to cancel your date, you need to show up. Even if you’re not totally feeling it, you made a promise and you need to go through with it. If you can call and cancel in advance, feel free to do that, but don’t leave someone hanging because you’re not ready to date, feeling insecure, or are no longer interested.
2. Choosing The Wrong Location
When choosing a first date location, make sure it’s the kind of place that lets you and your date get to know each other. Go for dinner, coffee or head out to the zoo. These are all great options. If you’re having a meal together, choose a place that isn’t too pricey or too cheap. No one likes a showoff or a cheapskate! How about an art gallery? You can talk about the art so you don’t have to talk about yourselves the whole time. Don’t take your date to a noisy club. You don’t want to spend the entire night yelling in each other’s ears or worse yet, not talking.
Make sure you know where you’re going, so you know what to wear. Don’t be afraid to dress up a little. That means you’ll need to leave the sweats at home (unless you’re doing something physical). Guys, wear a nice shirt. Ladies, it’s okay to show a little skin, but remember, you’re making a first impression and you want it to be one that shows you have class.
4. Giving Them Gifts
Guys, you don’t need to show up with 3 dozen roses and a huge box of chocolates on the first date. And ladies, you don’t need to buy him a gold watch. These gestures make you look desperate (and a little crazy). Instead, wow your date with witty banter and good manners. Keep it simple. If the date goes well, you’ll have other opportunities to give them gifts down the road.
5. Heavy Conversation
Keep the conversation light on the first date. Avoid the temptation to talk about nasty exes, the medications you’re own, religion, politics and money. You can disclose a little about your past (where you’re from, what you studied in school, you hobbies, etc.), but don’t unload you life’s baggage on them before the appetizer arrives.
6. Being Overcritical
Don’t scrutinize your date too much. Don’t obsess over how it went or what each word or gesture meant. It’s a first date! Don’t dismiss them if they didn’t wow you. Everyone is nervous on a first date, even you. If you go on a second date (and maybe a third, fourth, etc.) they may unwind and you’ll get a better sense of who they really are.
7. Being a Bad Listener
When it comes to a first date, you should listen more than talk. Move the spotlight off yourself and on to the other person. It’s a conversation, not a monologue! And keep your eyes on your date. Don’t look at the hot waitress or waiter. Leave your phone in your pocket, don’t answer calls and don’t respond to texts.
8. Overindulging in Food and Drink
Don’t drink so much that you get sloppy and inappropriate. Don’t eat so much that your clothes get uncomfortable. Show a little self-control. No one is going to find you charming if you’re intoxicated and eating everything in sight.
9. Not Following Up
If you want to go out with them again, call them the next day. It shows them you’re interested and if you are, don’t play games by waiting three days to call or waiting for them to call you. If you had a great time, make sure the other person knows it. Plan a second date and get to know them even better!