Have you ever been with a partner that has cheated on you? The truth is, you still probably have feelings for them even if they have hurt you. Most people don’t want to be forgiving but they have a hard time letting go of the love that they have.
Falling out of love with someone that has hurt you is hard. It can be hard to look at someone that betrayed you, but it can be harder to leave them. This can be the biggest heartbreak that you have ever had.
How can you get over someone that cheated on you? How can you get rid of the strong emotions that you have for this person?
Falling Out of Love
If you have a partner that has cheated on you then you know that walking away is probably the best thing that you can do. You might wonder how you can do this because you realize that you still have feelings for them. Here is how:
Don’t Blame Yourself
No matter what your partner did to you, either a physical affair or an emotional affair, you need to not blame yourself. They decided what they wanted to do, and they are the one that cheated, not you. Even if you feel that its your fault, you have to stop that.
You are not to blame for what someone else did to you. If they were cheating on you, they are the ones that messed up, not you.
Cut The Cheater Off
You have to take your dignity back and cut the cheater off as soon as you can. You need to stop calling them, texting them, seeing them or trying to make small talk. Don’t worry if they are okay or not but allow yourself time to heal.
You might be able to stay friends with this person later, but you need to have a no contact rule from them for at least a month to allow yourself time to move forward.
When You Have to Co-Parent
If you have to co-parent with a partner that has cheated on you, you need to communicate only about the children and nothing else.
Stay off social media
Take a break from social media, as well. Don’t keep looking at what they are doing or where they are going. If you have to stay on social media, block them off of your accounts so you can get over them.
It can be hard to block someone that you have feelings for but if you are going to be tempted to reach out to them then blocking them is the best idea.
See Your Emotions
Allow yourself to have your emotions. Don’t try to hide them. You are normal and you are allowed to have feelings. You will feel negative feelings due to the hurt that you faced and when you feel like being mad, crying, screaming or whatever, do it.
Take Time
Take time in your life to heal from your heartbreak. You need to not rush into other relationships or think that you will heal right away. It takes time to get over someone that you gave your heart to.
Don’t set a time frame on when you will feel better and make sure that you are giving yourself the time that you need.
Don’t Get Revenge or Hate Them
You have to choose not to hate your cheating partner. You have to forgive them so that you can move forward. You also need to make sure that you are not trying to get revenge. It will take time to get over this person, but you don’t want to be negative along the way.
Stop Overthinking Things
Most people wonder why their partner cheated and what they did wrong. Stop thinking about what happened and think about how you can better your life. You don’t need to ask what you should have done differently or if they deserved to stay in your life.
Put your questions out of your mind and take time to close the relationship and to move forward and feel better about who and where you are.
You made the decision to leave this person so that you can better yourself and you need to do just that.
Know it Happened
Know that the cheating happened and accept it. It happened and even though it wasn’t supposed to happen, it did. Sometimes things just happen because they do and even if this wasn’t the purpose, another door will open for you at some point in your life.
You learned a lesson on who to trust and you saw that you are a strong person that can make it through things that are hard. You are still the same person, and you can see that this was actually something that worked out best for you in the end. Just give it time.
Date When Ready
Whenever you are ready to seek a new relationship, do it. You don’t have to rush into anything, and you can take time to have fun and meet new people. Do things for you that make you happy and make you feel excited.
Allow whatever happens to happen but don’t find someone just based on feeling lonely. Make sure that you find someone that you actually feel comfortable with and someone you really like.
Rebounds
Some people go into rebound relationships, and they date someone just because they feel sad and alone after infidelity. Don’t do this to yourself or to the other person. You don’t want to hold someone on a string and hurt their feelings if you break up with them because you didn’t really like them.
Become the Best You
Become the best you that you can. Don’t do things that hurt yourself but learn to have self-care. Go out and workout, eat right, be your best you. Find new friends, hang out with family, and do things that benefit your life.
As you improve your life, you will feel better, and you will see that you can be great. You can do what makes you happy. Be single and have fun while you are.
Self-Love
Love yourself more than you love other people. Fall in love with who you are and what you are. Let your self-esteem grow. Know that you are worth it and that you are important. You have to love yourself more than you love the ex that cheated on you.
Talk to Someone
Talk to someone that you trust. You can talk to your friends, family or you can talk to someone that is a professional. If you need to get over hurt and pain and you don’t seem to be healing, seeing a professional can help you. This can help you to get your mental health on the right track.
Can You Love a Cheater?
Some people choose to stay with their partner that cheated on them. They do this because their emotions are too strong, and they are weak and cannot leave them. Sometimes they feel that they aren’t going to be able to find anyone else.
When Does the Pain Leave?
The pain of having someone cheat on you might take a long time to get over. You need to give yourself a year to heal and to move forward in your life. After you start to heal you will see that you can move on, and you don’t hurt as much.
How Long Should You Stay?
You should stay with your cheating partner as long as you want to. Whenever you are ready to leave, leave but if you choose to stay, that is up to you.
Will You Change?
Everyone that is cheated on changes in some way or another. This may be a positive change where you see yourself strong or a negative change where you don’t trust people anymore.
Final Thoughts
Falling out of love after your partner cheats on you isn’t easy but you can do it. You can learn to love yourself and you can do it on your own if that is what you choose.